It’s the resounding echo of children by week five of the Summer holiday: “Muuuuuummmmmmmm….I’m boooooooorrred.” You’ve visited all the beaches and reluctantly agreed to be the older sister in endless games of pretend. There have been many “ballet shows” to endure, where you clap and smile dutifully while contemplating the glass of red awaiting you at 6pm. Or earlier. No judgement here.
Inevitably, boredom will hit.
There comes a point when you just want peace. Ideally, you hope for everyone to amuse themselves while you continue on with adulting (which sadly doesn’t break for the Summer).
In the past, I would spend my evenings setting up activities for my children to complete the following day; small worlds, busy bags, elaborate cafes or literacy prompts. But eight years later, several lockdowns and a child who still doesn’t sleep through the night at the age of five, I’m going to be real. I am not that mum anymore. My reservoirs are depleted. In my heart I wish to be her again but my body and mind say “no”.
Instead, I deflect my children’s requests for stimulation quite guiltlessly now. When they come to me with complaints of boredom, my response is always the same. “You’re bored? That’s great! What a wonderful opportunity to be creative. I’ve seen all the awesome things you’ve come up with in the past so I know you’ll find something to do in no time.” Cue the requisite eye-roll.
I’m not going to lie, sometimes boredom can be painful. I expect the inevitable sibling squabble as they drift about aimlessly. This is until someone comes up with a brilliant play idea that usually absorbs them for hours. If I were to present them with my list of suggestions, I would either be shot down immediately, or the activity would last approximately five minutes.
Allowing children to sit with and push through boredom is one of the best skills you can bestow on them. In a world where boredom has been all but eradicated by technology this is a skill – I believe – that lies at the heart of creativity.
Our minds are not meant to be engaged in relentless pursuits one hundred percent of the time. A TED talk by Adam Grant highlights the value in moderate procrastination on original thinking. We need time and space to think creatively. This is where great change begins. If we can give our children opportunities to experience boredom, we give them permission to embrace lateral thinking and fresh possibilities.
What to do if you can’t cope with the accompanying whining – that will eventually pass, I promise. Buy yourself a good pair of noise cancelling headphones and lock yourself in the laundry until the boredom passes. Again, no judgement here.
What is your default reaction when your children come to you with complaints of boredom? Let me know in the comments below.
