Dear weary mama,
You’ve woken up barely rested from a night of broken sleep. From the moment you get out of bed you are fielding demands for breakfast (in a particular colour bowl), wiping dirty bottoms and refereeing sibling squabbles. You hide the dark shadows beneath concealer and resolve to just get on with it.
As the morning drags on and time seems to be ticking backwards, you attempt to ignore that niggling feeling you just don’t have it in you today. But there are chores to do, endless requests for snacks, games to be played, needs to be met; and it all falls on you.
As the day continues you start to react out of exhaustion and resentment rather than love. You are not the person you want to be but you are running on an empty tank and there is nothing left of you to give. You’re spent.
I know because this was me for too long. In truth, it still is some days. I got to such a low point in my parenting that some days I didn’t like myself or my family. And I knew something had to change.
I realised I needed more time away from my children if I was going to be the best mum I could be. And I didn’t even feel guilty or selfish. I’m not talking about an annual spa break or weekend away with the girls (although these are great too). I needed to carve out time for myself each and every day.
So, I began waking up at 5am. What?!? I know, I know, it sounds ludicrous to wake up at sparrow-fart when you are already exhausted and sleep deprived. But I kid you not, waking early has changed my life. Getting myself up and dressed without disruption or nagging, praying, reading in peace, doing bits and pieces of admin…bliss. I don’t risk making tea lest I wake one of the children and au revoir tranquility and solitude. But that would be truly heavenly.
I know now that without space and rest I become bitter and resentful. And that is not fair on my family. I have a responsibility to them and myself to do all I can to thrive.
Can you find a time in your day that is yours and yours alone? You don’t just deserve a break, you need it.
And if you do, have a cuppa for me.
Love,
Mum Rox
